1. Tara was affected by her father’s opinions and choices. How was she affected by her mother’s?
I think to some extent she was affected more by her Mother's choices because sometimes her Mother seemed to make an effort to help her and at other times she was completely indifferent to her.
2. As an adult, and despite fears for her safety, Tara keeps returning to her family. Why do you think she does this?
Because they are her family and what she knows. Having grown up that way to Tara it was normal.
3. Why do you think Tara wrote this book?
In order to get some closure and make her voice heard.
4. The book starts with a quote from Virginia Woolf: “The past is beautiful because one never realizes an emotion at the time. It expands later, and thus we don’t have complete emotions about the present, only the past.” What do you think this means and why would Tara start her memoir with this?
I haven't got a clue, her past sounds AWFUL to me.
5. Tara wrote that her life was often narrated by others, with strong, forceful voices. She eventually realizes that her voice could be as strong. What is voice and how important is it that everyone find their own?
What YOU believe and how YOU feel about yourself and the world around you. Tara often let others especially her Father dictate what she believed and felt.
6. Tara’s father makes his case for homeschooling by saying three of his children went on to get their PhDs. What do you make of this?
What this family did doesn't even remotely resemble homeschooling. And as a Homeschool Mother I resent her Father's statement. The best that can be said is that 3 of his children went on to get their PhDs in spite of the lack of educational opportunities in their family. What this family did is closer to unschooling (which is allowing the child to only study what they are interested in) but doesn't even meet the criteria for unschooling (which usually has at least structured study times).
7. What impact did the steady narration of preparing for end times have on Tara as a child?
She was constantly frightened
8. In the end of the book Tara writes that she is a different person from her father’s daughter, and her 16-year-old self. She says that this selfhood could be called many things (transformation, metamorphosis, falsity, betrayal) but she called it an education. What do you think of this?
Her education allowed her to move beyond the false beliefs her Father had indoctrinated her with during her childhood.
9. When Tara’s parents visited her in Cambridge, she said that the ability to evaluate many different ideas, histories, and points of view were the heart of what it means to self-create. Do you agree with this?
To some extent yes
10. Audrey sought out Tara’s help in telling her parents how abusive Shawn was. When Tara told her parents and sought out Audrey’s help in confirming it, Audrey did not support the history of Shawn’s abuse. Why do you think Audrey changed her mind? Do you think things would have turned out differently if the two sisters supported each other?
I think Audrey had to much to lose, her family, her income (she worked for her parents) and her place in local society.
11. Why do you think Tara’s parents thought she was more dangerous than Shawn?
Because she threatened their beliefs.
12. In the earlier chapters of the book, Tara states that she often felt shame/humiliation and seemed to think she was deserving of the words used to control/define her (slut, whore, etc.). After she goes to Rome, this theme appears to vanish. Why do you think that is?
13. Dr. Kerry said to Tara, “You act like someone who’s impersonating someone else…as if your life depends on it”. What do you think he meant?
Tara didn't feel like she deserved to be there so she was acting like she thought someone who did deserve to be there would.
14. Tara’s father was never diagnosed with any mental illness. Do you think mental illness was a factor in the family? If so, to what extent?
The entire family appears somewhat mentally ill and I think it played a huge role in the family dynamics.
15. Tara writes that she felt ashamed when she takes Shawn to the hospital after the motorcycle accident. What is the source/cause of this emotion?
The fact that she disobeyed her Father and didn't have his "faith".
16. What do you think is the source of Shawn’s violence?
I think it was a combination of things 1.) how he was raised 2.) physical trauma who knows how many times he suffered brain injuries before Tara was old enough to document it.
I think to some extent she was affected more by her Mother's choices because sometimes her Mother seemed to make an effort to help her and at other times she was completely indifferent to her.
2. As an adult, and despite fears for her safety, Tara keeps returning to her family. Why do you think she does this?
Because they are her family and what she knows. Having grown up that way to Tara it was normal.
3. Why do you think Tara wrote this book?
In order to get some closure and make her voice heard.
4. The book starts with a quote from Virginia Woolf: “The past is beautiful because one never realizes an emotion at the time. It expands later, and thus we don’t have complete emotions about the present, only the past.” What do you think this means and why would Tara start her memoir with this?
I haven't got a clue, her past sounds AWFUL to me.
5. Tara wrote that her life was often narrated by others, with strong, forceful voices. She eventually realizes that her voice could be as strong. What is voice and how important is it that everyone find their own?
What YOU believe and how YOU feel about yourself and the world around you. Tara often let others especially her Father dictate what she believed and felt.
6. Tara’s father makes his case for homeschooling by saying three of his children went on to get their PhDs. What do you make of this?
What this family did doesn't even remotely resemble homeschooling. And as a Homeschool Mother I resent her Father's statement. The best that can be said is that 3 of his children went on to get their PhDs in spite of the lack of educational opportunities in their family. What this family did is closer to unschooling (which is allowing the child to only study what they are interested in) but doesn't even meet the criteria for unschooling (which usually has at least structured study times).
7. What impact did the steady narration of preparing for end times have on Tara as a child?
She was constantly frightened
8. In the end of the book Tara writes that she is a different person from her father’s daughter, and her 16-year-old self. She says that this selfhood could be called many things (transformation, metamorphosis, falsity, betrayal) but she called it an education. What do you think of this?
Her education allowed her to move beyond the false beliefs her Father had indoctrinated her with during her childhood.
9. When Tara’s parents visited her in Cambridge, she said that the ability to evaluate many different ideas, histories, and points of view were the heart of what it means to self-create. Do you agree with this?
To some extent yes
10. Audrey sought out Tara’s help in telling her parents how abusive Shawn was. When Tara told her parents and sought out Audrey’s help in confirming it, Audrey did not support the history of Shawn’s abuse. Why do you think Audrey changed her mind? Do you think things would have turned out differently if the two sisters supported each other?
I think Audrey had to much to lose, her family, her income (she worked for her parents) and her place in local society.
11. Why do you think Tara’s parents thought she was more dangerous than Shawn?
Because she threatened their beliefs.
12. In the earlier chapters of the book, Tara states that she often felt shame/humiliation and seemed to think she was deserving of the words used to control/define her (slut, whore, etc.). After she goes to Rome, this theme appears to vanish. Why do you think that is?
13. Dr. Kerry said to Tara, “You act like someone who’s impersonating someone else…as if your life depends on it”. What do you think he meant?
Tara didn't feel like she deserved to be there so she was acting like she thought someone who did deserve to be there would.
14. Tara’s father was never diagnosed with any mental illness. Do you think mental illness was a factor in the family? If so, to what extent?
The entire family appears somewhat mentally ill and I think it played a huge role in the family dynamics.
15. Tara writes that she felt ashamed when she takes Shawn to the hospital after the motorcycle accident. What is the source/cause of this emotion?
The fact that she disobeyed her Father and didn't have his "faith".
16. What do you think is the source of Shawn’s violence?
I think it was a combination of things 1.) how he was raised 2.) physical trauma who knows how many times he suffered brain injuries before Tara was old enough to document it.
